Family Gatherings and Love

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Every family gathering brings back old memories.  You talk about the things you did when you were young, or like in my family you bring up all the things you did wrong.  I am not sure why my family does that.  Is it just a reminder that you were flawed once, still learning about the world or to remind ourselves that someone is not perfect.  Or are we still hurting from childhood hurts.  Things that happened while you were growing up tend to bubble out at family parties, like the time I put a rock up my nose when I was old enough to know better and got it stuck.  Why does that story still to this day come up, perhaps to remind me to laugh at my flaws, or perhaps to help someone else feel better about theirs.

Our Thanksgivings continue to get bigger as we are inviting more extended family.  Old memories resurface and replay in my mind. I think it is important to connect with your family.  Close and extended, friends far and near.  I think that is what this country needs right now.  When did we become to closed off as a society, fearful of allowing others into our hearts and minds?  It seems like we are isolating ourselves more and more.

My daughters and I were talking the other day, and the subject of  "they don't want any more siblings." came up.  Not that I am in the market for more children, and I honestly don't know how the subject came up. I asked my youngest if she was afraid that I would not have enough love for her if I were to have another child. She responded that she didn't think I would.  I said that there is more than enough love in this world to go around, and I would always love anyone in my life equally.  My oldest, of course, disagreed, as she feels I love the youngest more as she requires more attention. My youngest also disagreed, but in an entirely different way.  She said that I love myself the most then I love everyone else.

You always wonder if your children actually listen to you and what they remember when you talk about deep things. One of the talks we have frequently is about loving and caring for yourself.  That you have to love you first before you can give/ show love to someone else.  Love is such a difficult concept to understand when you're young, and can get even more confusing when you are old enough to know what love really means.

 It took me a long time to love myself, flaws and all.  In fact I still struggle from time to time.  You have to reach deep down and forgive yourself for your flaws and past mistakes.  You have to stop blaming your past for how you feel in the present day. You have to realize that even though you are awkward, quiet and have a difficult time holding conversations that you are perfect just the way you are.  When you allow love to shine through flaws melt away and all you want to do is extend your arms and reach out and connect with others.

I am so lucky to have a big extended family.  I enjoy watching it grow.

Thanks for reading my ramblings.

Peace, Love and Gratitude

Comments

  1. I love the human condition and we cannot be human without flaws. To me they are one of the most important parts of living, in our own flaws we get to experience all of humanity. I think old family stories about times when were less than perfect are are there and remembered at family gatherings just to remind us...this is my tribe...we have been through a lot together and we still love. laugh and cry as a tribe.

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