We Create Ripples

I am currently reading this book, Manifesting Your Greatest Self by Nick Ortner.  I have been working on my greatest self my whole life.  It first started when I was young and had major social anxiety.  I worked hard to over come talking to others, speaking in front of class and being able to talk with those I saw as authority figures without crying.  Then I worked on my depression later in life, which prompted me to work on past hurts and regrets and all of the emotional baggage that comes with growing up and living life.  I learned about tapping 7 years ago and have used it on and off for a variety of things.  You’d think that after all of the self help books and seminars I would already be my greatest self, and yet I still have a long way to go. 

While reading chapter six of this book, I realized how far I have come, and how very far I still have to go.  Tapping makes you honest.  It forces you to speak the truth in your mind.  The chapter I was reading asked me how I want to feel.  The words flew out of my mouth.  I want to matter, I want what I do to matter.

Then it asks how you currently feel about your body,  My answer – I feel disconnected, because when I connect it hurts, it is tired even though I sleep, it is weak even though I exercise, it is unhealthy, even though I eat really, really healthy.  It goes through a list of life items: relationships, family, finances, career etc.  The main theme that kept coming up was a feeling of disconnection.  

I don't feel like what I do matters really to anyone, and maybe the reason I feel that way is because I have disconnected myself from everything.  So how do you go about getting connected with your life.  How do you allow yourself to feel like you matter and that what you do matters in life.

I don't have the answers, but I know what is working for me.  First, of course I use EFT Tapping, this technique gives me permission, in a way, to allow all of the negative feelings to flow and eventually leave my thoughts.

Then, I looked at where I could start connecting in my life.  Starting with my body.  What I do matters to my body.  When I eat well, I have energy to move.  When I move, my energy begins to flow.  When I flow, I am most at peace with where I am at in life.   

Looking at my relationships, family and friends, connecting is a little more challenging.  I am an introvert and consider myself an empath.  I generally avoid conversations and interaction with others, even people I am close with, because in the past it depleted my energy so much that it would take days to recoup.  Now it is much easier and less taxing on my energy.  I have learned to separate my energy from theirs, yet I still avoid others.

Why, why do I do it?  Being alone is easy, not interacting is easy.  It is the easy way out.  Easy is not the path to growth and learning, it is not the path to higher awareness or spiritual enlightenment.  It is not a path that brings joy, wonder or excitement.  There is no adventure or opportunity in easy.  I am aware of each moment I choose to disconnect with the world and now I am working on reconnecting with each.  Reconnecting relationships, reconnecting with family, with friends.  I am not good at reaching out yet, but I am making choices to create a path of abundant connection.

How do you connect with others?  Does life really matter, does what you do really matter in the grand scheme of things?  I believe it does.  We create ripples with our many moments each day.  The energy we bring to each situation can make things better or worse, it really is our choice.  Our actions and reactions speak louder than the words that pass by our lips.  I matter.  You matter.  Everything we do matters.

Peace Love and Gratitude