I Talk To Myself

Happiness is one of the most sought after feelings. It seems to be the one thing in life everyone wants, but no one seems to really have.  So what is it and how can you cultivate it in your life? First, happiness is more of a state of mind and way of being rather than just a feeling.  Many try and cultivate this precious feeling by filling their life with material things.  These material things only bring joy for a short time and when the feeling wears off then you are right back to where you began.  While others try to create the perfect life and post it for the world to see and admire.  This fabrication of a perfect life often backfires creating more unhappiness.  But there are things you can do in your life right now that will help you create happiness within yourself.  Finding your passion and joy is one of the easiest and fastest ways to sow happiness into your everyday life.  Even the act of just smiling can begin to change the vibr...

The decisions you make each day are either based on fear or love.  Think about your day, you make choices and decisions in each moment on how to react and respond to the world around you.  Would you say that you make your choices with love or do you make them out of fear.  It is cold outside, do you put on a hat and coat because you love your body and want to make sure it is comfortable or because you are afraid of being cold or getting sick or not wear one at all because you don't want to look silly.  You go to college because you love school and love the field you are going into or because your afraid if you don't you will be shunned by your family or afraid you won't be able to support yourself in life or because everyone else is so you don't want to look like a fool.  You make negative judgments about others out of fear of not being good enough yourself.  Choosing love is not the easiest choice, fear is way easier to side with because it makes you feel ...

When life hands you fear, look it over carefully.  Sometimes you have to just ask yourself, "Why am I afraid?" or "What am I really afraid of?"  The answers to those questions alone will give you a lot of insight.  In the moment of fear, it may be hard to ask those questions.  Try not to react but instead just listen, sometimes that is all you need for your fear to reveal its true cause. Where in your life do you freeze up, unable to speak or move?  This is my challenge for this morning.  Looking back on your life, where were the times where you froze?  I can think of one glaring memory of the time when I was in choir and I had a solo, why on earth I tried out for that I am not even sure, but I did and got a part.  When it came time to sing on stage, I froze unable to make a sound, all the words left me.  I was able to recover part way through, but man it sucked.  That little failure didn't stop me from trying out for plays, which I ...

If you're creative like me, you probably have a few unfinished projects around the house. Creative clutter weighs down on you, sometimes to the point of depression where you can't even do what you used to enjoy. There are simple ways you can go about cleaning up your creative clutter so that you have room for inspiration and opportunities to arise in your life. One of the first things you can do to help clear the creative clutter is is get out every unfinished project and set it in front of you.  Now I know this can be quite a task, I had a room full of them when I did this the first time. I was overwhelmed at the amount I had stored away over the years.  Well over 20 projects that I had started or bought stuff for and never started. Then you take each project and inspect it with love. Touch every piece of the unfinished item. Ask yourself why you started it, was if for someone or something.  Remember the feelings you had when you begun the project or bought the items...

I thought it would be interesting to document my process of finishing my unfinished projects.  I actually have several unfinished projects and like I said in the last post, I have gone through them once before.  Getting rid of things that no longer brought me joy or didn't like to begin with, and kept the ones I really liked and did want eventually finish.  I did finish some of those projects and it felt great, but then I lost steam and left others still unfinished.  So I went and looked at what I still have left to finish.  Not too much and I really have no excuses as I just have my sewing machine serviced and everything is super easy to do, just a matter of sitting down and doing it. One project that I have left are 6 rag dolls that just need hair and faces.  I had started them with the intent of using them as multi cultural dolls for the day care I worked for at the time.  That was over 5 years ago, and now I work as a children's librarian....

Why am I choosing to not finish my children's book?  It is a question that I keep asking myself.  I have what I need, all I have to do is finish three flower pictures and a few more butterfly pictures.  I wish I understood what was blocking me from completing it.  I guess because I don't think the pictures will be good enough.  I really don't have any excuses to not finish.  Wayne Dyer always said, "Don't die with your music still in you."  You have to use your gift and give it to the world but fear stops so many of us from ever playing with what the universe has gifted us. That is what life is about isn't it?  All about play.  I enjoy word play and I enjoy art play.  So why is it so difficult to just let it happen?  What old belief am I holding in my mind and body?  I did work really hard on the first 14 pages.  The above picture of the Tiger Lily that I still need to perfect are going to fill an entire page with h...

Every family gathering brings back old memories.  You talk about the things you did when you were young, or like in my family you bring up all the things you did wrong.  I am not sure why my family does that.  Is it just a reminder that you were flawed once, still learning about the world or to remind ourselves that someone is not perfect.  Or are we still hurting from childhood hurts.  Things that happened while you were growing up tend to bubble out at family parties, like the time I put a rock up my nose when I was old enough to know better and got it stuck.  Why does that story still to this day come up, perhaps to remind me to laugh at my flaws, or perhaps to help someone else feel better about theirs. Our Thanksgivings continue to get bigger as we are inviting more extended family.  Old memories resurface and replay in my mind. I think it is important to connect with your family.  Close and extended, friends far and near.  I think th...

Gratitude, a way of giving thanks and appreciating all that you have currently and all that is coming into your life.  It is the easiest and highest forms of prayer.  I started incorporating gratitude into my everyday life 10 years ago and it changed my life.  I was not necessarily a super positive person, in fact I had always found everything difficult or challenging, but when it came to others I was always good at giving pep talks to others or lifting their spirits. So I started simply.  I started posting my gratitude list on Facebook 10 years ago.  I would also invite others to post theirs. So how did posting my gratitude list change my life? On good days it was easy to come up with what I was grateful for, it was the bad days, the days that everything went wrong or I didn't feel well were the challenging ones.  They were also the ones that changed how I saw my life.  Coming up with something to appreciate on a day when you have every right to f...

In my dream last night, the doctor told me my problem was uncertainty.  It amuses me when the universe gives me clues to my journey while I am sleeping. I have never had a problem with uncertainty before, I have always just known what was to be and believed that knowing with all my heart.  My life followed those knowings to a tee, not wavering from the path that I had set forth.  Why is it that now I am uncertain about my life?  It is because I am uncertain with who I am, and what I want.  How was it so easy to have faith in the process when I was young? It is as if I have no idea where my life is going now.  Should I know?  Should I be demanding to know what's next?  How can I embrace this realm of unknowings? Blind trust.  I have always needed to know what's next.  Not knowing what's next has always given me anxiety or fear in some way, shape or form. There has been a bit of unease within me not knowing how, what or where to go n...