Life is a series of losses: From Grief to Gratitude

Life is a series of losses.  Some are big and some are small.  Through out my life I have had many small losses, and only a few big ones. You can lose anything, a grandparent, a job, a friend, a love your keys or an opportunity.  It doesn't matter to your body what you lose, it still treats it like a loss.  There is a set pattern of emotions that your mind and body need to process a loss. Shock, disbelief, sadness, regret, sorrow, anger, panic, numbness, self hate/self blame, forgiveness, love and gratitude; This is my pattern, your pattern may be a little different.

Image may contain: ocean, sky, outdoor, water and natureI went through a span of time when I refused to grieve; I would say whatever I lost was in a better place or that it didn't matter in the grand scheme of things. This only sets you back and holds onto the energy of grief.  This energy will build and continue to build until some small, itty bitty, tiny, little loss makes you explode with volcano like furry with tears and fowl anger flowing like electric lava sending shock-waves of burning rocks in every direction.

For most of my teenage and adult life, though, I would skip the sadness and sorrow and jump to anger, then stop at self hate and blame. It didn't matter what I lost, but it was obviously my fault for not giving enough: care, love, kindness, help, information, etc.  Sadness, sorrow forgiveness, love and gratitude had no place in my world, how could it possibly help at all. I hated loss and couldn't stand change, it always turned my world upside down, and it would stay for such a long time.

Little did I know how important it was to fully grieve.  To let every emotion come forward with ease and flow.  To be accepting of how I felt.  You can't begin to forgive, if you don't let sadness play through.  You can't begin to love if you hold on to your anger.  You can't hold on to gratitude, if you are still holding regret and self hate or blame.  Every emotion has a part to play.  Allow your grief to play through, but don't hold onto them let them leave when their time is finished.

In gratitude life becomes clear.

Peace, Love and Gratitude
Carrie Anne


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